Sunday, April 28, 2013

On goodbyes


Let me tell you an experience that changed my entire life. It was my second week during my summer vacation just this April. It was a day before my flight back to Singapore. It was a day after we arrived in Manila from our family Bicol trip. We received a very sad story. My aunt (the wife of my father’s brother) died. Prior to that, I made an itinerary on my two-weeks-vacation. I scheduled to go there but due to some circumstances, my schedule changed. I am almost given a chance to pay them a visit during our Tanay day-trip to visit our little farm. On our way there I asked my family if we can stop by since it’s just along the way. My mother said that we can’t since we are running after time. I lost my chance to see her again.  I felt sad because I am almost there, just 5 minutes away from their doorsteps but our car just passed by their street and drove forward, father and farther. It’s as if there is a force that wants to drag me out of the car and just walk. I restraint myself from saying something since I don’t want to ruin our trip, and since it is out of our plans to visit them that day.

The last time I saw her was 2 years ago. I am not close to her, but the pain is just unbearable. It is the pain of not being able to say goodbye to her. It is a pain of regret. Maybe, just maybe, if I’d asked my mother again if we can stop by, I might’ve been given a chance to see her before she left. It hurts not because I wasn’t able to know her well or be the nicest niece she ever had, it hurts because I wasn’t able to say goodbye. The most painful pain is not being able to say goodbye to someone, and letting them feel that they exist in your life.  It taught me the greatest lessons in life. It is to give time to the things that I think matters the most, by being a blessing to other’s by giving them just a portion of your time, and most importantly, to love as much as you can, while you still can.

Why am I blogging


I’ve been asked by someone “why are you blogging?” honestly speaking, I don’t know. I should say I don’t know if my answer is valid.

 

on a Sunday shift

It's been a long time since I last blogged. I went on a vacation and right now I am still reading backlogs of emails. A whoopping 4,000+ unread emails in my inbox waiting to be read. I'm so excited to tell you my 2 weeks vacation story.